It has occurred to me on several foggy mornings that I probably should not have _________ (texted/FaceBooked/blogged/emailed) the night before. I've woken up and looked at my __________ (phone/computer) and realized that I had contacted someone I didn't even give a crap about because I was half in the bag. I have never said anything mean, in fact, I'm a pretty nice drunk. I don't call anyone hammered anymore I just type away. I typically have correct grammar and spelling even though I'm typing like a chimpanzee with one eye shut. And if I were to talk at that moment would be scheriously schlurring. When I'm in the mood to contact dudes I've dated there needs to be a way to stop me.
So I figured it out...I will soon patent the Phone/Computer Breathalyzer. Curtsy. The only contact you can make is to a) call the police on yourself for drunk driving, b) call 911 to let them know how angry you are that computer doesn't work and ask to speak with their IT guy c) write in your own inbox what an ass you are for trying to contact ___________ (insert name here).
Is this blog making you miss Mad Libs as much as me right now?!
Oh and while searching for drunk texting photos I stumbled upon this gem:
AHHHHHH!!! Thanks for the giggle you Maven of All Things Awesome! xoxoxo
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