J. No No No

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SeeVjmAkEqA

Last night I was watching the So You Think You Can Dance finale and I was irritated about 2 things 1) Jakob did not win (although way to represent Boston Russell!) b) J. Lo's lip syncing and Louboutin song was atrocious. I mean I know you're a fly girl and you need to dance while you sing but holy lord J. Lo you need to work on the lip syncing. Or how about you dance less and sing live? The whole performance I spent looking through my fingers in horror. She was lip syncing and still sounded horrible.

And your song is retarded. "But it's the last time, I'm movin' on, I'm throwing on my Louboutins." "Watch these Red bottoms, And the back of my jeans." Seriously? The song is pathetic. Never mind that it stole these lyrics "I'm just a part time lover" and "Don't know what you got until it's gone". VOMIT! I know I've been a hater lately but this song just put me over the edge. First of all because I'm sick of idiot chicks talking about, "you know...the shoes with the red bottoms". Those shoes are designed by Christian Louboutin. Know why they have a red bottom? He was inspired by a drawing of a shoe with a red line through the heel. Know why people buy his shoes? a)they are gorgeous b) they are a status symbol like a Louis Vuitton bag.

J. Lo we do not need lil girls singing about leaving their creep boyfriends in $700 shoes. We are in a recession. Shit I would own every pair I could get my hands on if I could afford them, but I can't. Nor can most people. So can't we just leave them where they belong? They belong in fashion, on the runway, on people who can afford them, on celebrities, and on Madison Ave where I ogle them and walk away. I had a pair back when they were $400. But then I came to my senses and returned the money pits to Neiman where a much richer person could give them the one or two wears they deserved. If I had kept them I would have worn them to the gym, to clean my house, and to get the mail in jammies.

And don't walk away with just your Louboutins and jeans. Walk away with the 50" screen plasma and his wallet. Make a real statement.

I'm not a Louboutin hater (o'contraire) I am a "J. Lo are you freaking serious?" hater. Take Skeletor, AKA your hubby, and sing some ballads about your incomprehensible love of each other. Oh P.S. "Love?" is a great title for your latest CD J. Lo...guess what Bel, Biv, Devoe's is also called "Love". And I sure as hell would take some of their "Poison" over your craptastic "Louboutins". Stick to dancing in your Louboutins I'm gonna take the cotton out from my bleeding ears.

Yes I'm that disgusted.